Consistency
Bismillaah
Its only been a day or two since I last wrote but it feels like forever.. I don't know where I should start, should I start with the crazy dreams I've getting lately or the hell I've been through this week or why I've been through all of this this week pin pointing where exactly I went wrong..haha there's so much I learned this week its crazy and hey maybe it might benefit a few I don't know, but I definitely have to document this so I don't make the same mistake again.
It all began last Thursday evening. Thursday day actually. As usual I had a lesson to prepare for during mid day. The time I'd be having my nap. But foolishly I decided you know what, theres not enough time anyways so I'll rest after the lesson, which was after asr. So exhausted as I was I did the lesson, my eyes dying because I didn't sleep the night before so I was just dragging myself through the day it was crazy haha. So hamdulillah. The lessons over and its time to sleep.
But you know when you haven't slept for one night, one nap wont do it right? You need like a good solid 8 hours to make up for that night and for the nap throughout the day...But that didnt really enter my mind so I slept. All the way through maghrib. Mistake number one. Never, ever, ever sleep through a prayer. Ever. That's for your own safety. Spiritually and mentally. Its not meant to be slept through. But I was the fool. So I missed the maghrib athkar. And you can just imagine the dreams I had....they were dark, gloomy and just downright scary. Well that's what I got for sleeping before I recited surat Mulk and Sajdah. Which was mistake number 2. Two surahs that are there for our own good if we just use them properly. Rasulallah (s) would never slept without reciting them.
Jabir Radiyallahu ‘anhu narrates that Nabi Sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam did not use to sleep until he recited Alif Lam Mim Sajdah, (Surah 32) and Tabarakalladhl biyadihil mulk (Surah 67). (Tirmidhi)
I know the verses are long but its worth it trust me. And Im here, sleeping at the wrong time, dreaming of these very tall creatures, and me being so scared as Im with them, I dont know if they was the angel of death or not..but whatever they were I was afraid..and I dont normally dream of such things... I think it might have been a warning or a sign of my spiritual state at the moment...the vulnerability was real because if I read them I would have been protected..By the way, these surahs will protect a person in the underground world, the barzakh, in the life of the grave..If a person reads them in this life they would come and cover him and not leave him until he is granted intercession.
The Companion went to the Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ and said: 'O Rasullulah! I pitched my tent on a grave without knowing that is was a grave. Suddenly I heard a person from the grave reciting Surah al_Mulk till he completed it.' The Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ said : 'It is the defender and the deliverer - it delivers from the punishment of the grave.'"
[Tirmidhi]
They will basically be there to protect you from the punishment in the grave, and alot of people are punished for those things we'd find insignificant in this life..So you can see the virtue in reciting these surahs and not only that but they even do good for a person in this life. Surat Sajdah for example..with every verse a person reads his status his raised degrees and his bad deeds are made into good deeds. They are great surahs.
Okay so I already went wrong within a few hours. But the more crazier thing was the fact that I was into the habit or reciting Surah Kahf on Friday night and Frday morning because of its virtues.
Its only been a day or two since I last wrote but it feels like forever.. I don't know where I should start, should I start with the crazy dreams I've getting lately or the hell I've been through this week or why I've been through all of this this week pin pointing where exactly I went wrong..haha there's so much I learned this week its crazy and hey maybe it might benefit a few I don't know, but I definitely have to document this so I don't make the same mistake again.
It all began last Thursday evening. Thursday day actually. As usual I had a lesson to prepare for during mid day. The time I'd be having my nap. But foolishly I decided you know what, theres not enough time anyways so I'll rest after the lesson, which was after asr. So exhausted as I was I did the lesson, my eyes dying because I didn't sleep the night before so I was just dragging myself through the day it was crazy haha. So hamdulillah. The lessons over and its time to sleep.
But you know when you haven't slept for one night, one nap wont do it right? You need like a good solid 8 hours to make up for that night and for the nap throughout the day...But that didnt really enter my mind so I slept. All the way through maghrib. Mistake number one. Never, ever, ever sleep through a prayer. Ever. That's for your own safety. Spiritually and mentally. Its not meant to be slept through. But I was the fool. So I missed the maghrib athkar. And you can just imagine the dreams I had....they were dark, gloomy and just downright scary. Well that's what I got for sleeping before I recited surat Mulk and Sajdah. Which was mistake number 2. Two surahs that are there for our own good if we just use them properly. Rasulallah (s) would never slept without reciting them.
Jabir Radiyallahu ‘anhu narrates that Nabi Sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam did not use to sleep until he recited Alif Lam Mim Sajdah, (Surah 32) and Tabarakalladhl biyadihil mulk (Surah 67). (Tirmidhi)
I know the verses are long but its worth it trust me. And Im here, sleeping at the wrong time, dreaming of these very tall creatures, and me being so scared as Im with them, I dont know if they was the angel of death or not..but whatever they were I was afraid..and I dont normally dream of such things... I think it might have been a warning or a sign of my spiritual state at the moment...the vulnerability was real because if I read them I would have been protected..By the way, these surahs will protect a person in the underground world, the barzakh, in the life of the grave..If a person reads them in this life they would come and cover him and not leave him until he is granted intercession.
The Companion went to the Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ and said: 'O Rasullulah! I pitched my tent on a grave without knowing that is was a grave. Suddenly I heard a person from the grave reciting Surah al_Mulk till he completed it.' The Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ said : 'It is the defender and the deliverer - it delivers from the punishment of the grave.'"
[Tirmidhi]
They will basically be there to protect you from the punishment in the grave, and alot of people are punished for those things we'd find insignificant in this life..So you can see the virtue in reciting these surahs and not only that but they even do good for a person in this life. Surat Sajdah for example..with every verse a person reads his status his raised degrees and his bad deeds are made into good deeds. They are great surahs.
Okay so I already went wrong within a few hours. But the more crazier thing was the fact that I was into the habit or reciting Surah Kahf on Friday night and Frday morning because of its virtues.
مَنْ قَرَأَ سُورَةَ الْكَهْفِ فِي يَوْمِ الْجُمُعَةِ أَضَاءَ لَهُ مِنَ النُّورِ مَا بَيْنَ الْجُمُعَتَيْنِ
"Whoever recites Surah Al-Kahf on the day of Friday will have a light for him between this Friday and the next. "
Normally I'd read it just in the mornings but since I realized the hadith said "yawmul Jumuah" I figured you could read it at night too since yawm is a period of time consisting of morning and evening. But for some odd I reason I decided to leave the recitation for the morning. You'd think, no big deal, your still gonna read it in the morning right? No. This might have been the reason why my week was just crap haha, pardon my language. First mistake was leaving off something I always do. They say consistency in good deed is beloved to Allah. So even if its small you should never give it up. And even when you do leave it something evil will takes its place so keep it up whatever good your doing. I. Being a fool preferred my sleep and left it off for the morning. So that's like all 110 verses to read in one sitting which is pretty tough for someone not use to it. But I did it anyways thinking I could make up for last night. But to no avail.
And this entire week was a struggle. And I think it was because of my slacking with regards to this surahs recitation. Its a surah that protects one from the fitnah of this life, its a surah that gives a person nuur in his heart, its a grand surah.
See normally I'd be able to avoid tense situations...you know the ones where your blood begins to boil and your patience is tested big time and the kinds where you dont know whats gonna happen next...those life or death situations where someones life is at stake..You know those moment of Fitnah where anything could wrong, especially if you find yourself being the one in a weakend position where anything could happen to you...
Well lets say this surah, if read, you'd be protected from such moments of vulnerability. And as foolish as I was I was exposed to them not knowing why till I realized that I neglected that one thing that would be protected me. I wondered why I was finding myself in these situations, why? Why was I being put into these fitan where I am in the weakened position. (When this normally doesnt happen cuz I'd usually feel safe as hell) Why was I finding my patience being tested, not just any kind of test but the kind where if Allah didnt save me I dont know where I would end up. Almost like when a person is on the brink of hell, may Allah protect us. You'll fall any moment unless Allah saves you. I kinda felt like that during some moments. And Alhamdulillah I didnt do anything stupid but chose to restrain my anger instead. Anger can really ruin things. Ruin things on a whole different level. Its crazy. May Allah protect us all.
After some time speculating over where I went wrong this week I was able to pinpoint it. Never knew how heavy of an influence one surah can have. Now I think I can understand the importance and virtue of this surah and see why of all surahs this is the one to read on Fridays.
And guys, by the way when your spiritual state is off balance you in the entirety are off balance including your state of mind, which affects how you feel about things which effects even the way you act towards others so your relationships will take a toll because if you cant be happy with yourself how can you even possibly be considerate towards someone else's well-being? You wont. You'll find yourself so absorbed in your own issues that those that really matter will feel neglected because of the attention your not giving them. So spirituality is very very important and weighs heavily on not only your own well being but on the well-being of the people around you.
Really hope this week is better iA.
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